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marckaye91

Put it out there


fail

In Hamlet, Shakespeare writes: “…for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” There are a few different interpretations including Hamlet basically saying that ignorance is bliss or the other which is that we are, in essence, a product of our own thoughts. I guess both are true.

Being a realist sucks. Especially when you’re a dreamer, too. Somehow, the realist always seems to trump the dreamer. I am not sure why it can’t be the other way around, at least some of the time. The problem with the realist, though, at least in my case, is that it always seems to be overly cautious. Worse of all, when the worst case scenario really does happen, that inner voice that says: “hah! I told you this wasn’t going to work out” chimes in and the dreamer retreats.

I have been spending a lot of time, (too much time), thinking about why some people seem to be so content and others, restless. I think being a creative type does not help at all, or at least for me. The one thing I did realize, however, is that if you are going to do something, you really have to do it all the way. That doesn’t mean “quit your job and head out to L.A.” all the way.

Let me explain from something I can relate to – comedy. While it is far from completely gone, for a long time I was very embarrassed about the fact that this “responsible” adult that I was carrying around – husband, father, son, friend, employee – was so passionate about writing and learning the craft of comedy. I mean, turn on the TV and it is clear that there aren’t too many people in my age group doing comedy who haven’t been doing it since their 20s. As such, I talked myself through it convincing myself that it’s good enough for me to just try something and, therefore, i never went all out for a long time – never tried things that were really scary like being completely true on stage, being ok with having some people be uncomfortable or even doing on-the-spot improv.

That was a huge mistake. Here’s why. For someone like me (and maybe you are the same way), I am more disappointed in myself for not just “putting it out there” and trying something than playing it safe and wondering what would have happened if I had tried. Even on my worst “go all out” days, I felt proud that I tried.

The truth is that spending time wondering about why people seem so content is a waste of time. Perhaps they really aren’t. Perhaps they are not risk takers and don’t want to be. That’s fine, too. Perhaps they are, themselves, “putting it out there” and passionate about something that doesn’t involve mowing the lawn or watching the game. And if that’s their thing, more power to them.

What matters is that life really is short. Super, super short. But it can feel incredibly long sitting on the sidelines. I rather feel like time is passing me by while I try to fit it all in. Otherwise, what’s the point?

Until next time,

Marc

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